The Monon Trail is one of my favorite parts of the city.

The fact that I live, essentially, on the trial only makes it better.  It’s my escape, just a few steps away and it links me to nearly the entire city north and to downtown. Bike, run, walk – I use the trail every month of the year and love nearly everything about it.

That said, while trapped behind a number of increasingly familiar sights today on my attempted bike-ride home, I’ve come up with some additional rules I think the trail and its users can benefit from that will keep it as a treasure of the city.

TOP THREE THINGS YOU DIDN’T KNOW ABOUT THE MONON TRAIL

3. OMG, MY BFF AND ARE ARE LIKE TOTALLY INSEPARABLE!

Teenage cliques and new families with new puppies and new mega-big strollers – I’m looking at you.  I get it, you want to spend time with your friends (furry or 2-legged) on the trail. The Monon is a GREAT place for that! I often use the trail with my friends as well.  Here’s where the trouble begins though… you seem to think that you are being rude by not walking side-by-side-by-side-by-side with your friends, mega-strollers, puppies or other friends who have brought their own mega-strollers and new puppies.

The traill has two lanes. One goes north, one goes south. You can remember this because there is a big red line going down the middle.  If your group is so wide, you’ve crossed over the red line? Consider walking in groups in front of and behind each other. I promise, your friends can still hear you, talk to you and you will still be friends after you leave the trail.

By staying on your side, you save yourself from the likelihood that someone has to go out of their way to avoid you. Someone coming from behind you that has to pass you or someone coming toward you that is trying to pass someone.  You don’t need to be single-file on the trail, but please, PLEASE, for the sake of the rest of us, stay to one lane of the trail.

2. BONFIRE SMELLS WELCOME, BUTT YOUR SMELL ISN’T.

The trail is convenient for you to get from your apartment to the bar, that’s great! During daylight hours, certainly, use the trail to commute, that’s certainly a great use for the trail.

BUT, while you’re on your way… can you not smoke like a chimney?  A majority of the people who are on the trail use it for exercise and enjoyment of being outdoors.  Walking, running, blading and biking are all frequent activities on the trail.  Sucking your smoke and staring at your cigarette butts? Not part of the intended ambiance of a nature trail. Pack away your butts while we work off ours.

1. CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW?

I may be alone on this one, but it’s a big pet peeve of mine.  When I use the trail, I look forward to getting away from the noise of the street.  If I wanted to run somewhere noisy, I’d stay on the street and run on the sidewalks.  Noise is easy to come by, the silence of the trail is not.

Just because your phone is mobile, doesn’t mean it should go everywhere you go. Carry it for safety, for music (with headphones), or for gps purposes.

DO NOT WALK DOWN THE TRAIL YACKING ON IT.

It’s annoying to everyone around you. Need to take a call? Step off the trail. It’s just that simple, step to the side.  Then we go right past you and respect the fact you tried to get off the path. When you walk (always EVER SO SLOWLY and usually in the middle of the path) you noise pollute a much greater area and just get in the way of those trying to enjoy the trail.